Bob G.'s Profile
A government employee sat in his office, and out of boredom, decided to see what was inside his old filing cabinet. He poked through the contents and came across an old brass lamp. "This will look good on my mantel," he said, and took it home with him. While polishing the lamp, a genie appeared and, as usual, granted him three wishes. "I would like an ice-cold Coke right now." He gets his Coke and drinks it. Now that he can think more clearly, he states his second wish. "I wish to be on an island with beautiful women, who find me irresistible." Suddenly, he's on an island with gorgeous women eyeing him lustfully. He tells the genie his third and last wish. "I wish I'd never have to work again." Instantly, he was back in his government office.
I try to smile and be friendly :) , southern hospitality ya'll know ♥, have a blessed cool day . 99 here yesterday at 530 pm ?
The soul's joy lies in doing.
— Percy Bysshe Shelley
One comes, finally, to believe whatever one repeats to one's self, whether the statement is true or false.
Our inner dialogue can have awesome power. It often determines the behavior that defines who we are. We do, of course, have some choice as to the direction this inner dialogue will take. It's as easy to affirm our self-worth with positive messages as it is to tear ourselves down with negative ones. And yet, many of us fall so easily into negative patterns of thought.
As with so many aspects of our life, we become proficient at what we regularly practice. The regular, preferably daily, use of positive affirmations can make such a profound contribution to our well-being and willingness to grow and learn, that it can change the course of our life. All we have to do is develop the discipline to make these positive messages habitual. In so doing, we bring our vision of ourselves in line with God's, Who accepts us completely as we are.
The messages I give myself today will remind me that I am a capable and lovable child of God.
I need to do this me and a good friend are not getting along right now . have a blessed hump day , Christ be with you ♥
Today's Joke - Wed, 19 Jul 2017
Soon after marriage, a lady's husband stopped wearing his wedding ring. She asked, "Why don't you ever wear your wedding band?"
He replied, "It cuts off my circulation."
She answered back, "It's supposed to!"
ordered me some long sleeve spf 40 shirts to fish in supposed to be cooler than shirtless and forsome reason my arms break out during the fishing season , that is with sunblock applied 30mintes before fishing and again when i get on the water allergic to thesun ,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,,come on ?????
More important than learning how to recall things is finding ways to forget things that are cluttering the mind. Before going to sleep at night, empty your consciousness of unwanted things, even as you empty your pockets.
Many of us may make lists of things we need to do. We may refer to a calendar for our scribbled notations of places to go and people to see. We may look over our course syllabus for chapters to read or papers to write. Or we may keep it all in our heads, mentally checking off each item as it's done.
But tonight we can put away the lists, close the calendar book, put away the course syllabus, and empty our minds of obligations, tasks, and duties. Unless we want to keep our heads spinning during a sleepless night, we must learn to turn off the achieving and doing sides of our minds and give room to the relaxing and spiritual sides. We can take away the items cluttering our minds, one at a time. Tomorrow will arrive in its own time; tonight is the time for us to relax.
Tonight I can close my eyes and visualize putting aside each item. I will achieve total relaxation and peace.
there's a kid next door i'm gonna make my new helper , the last two brothers were interested in getting the money fast as they . this kid is more nature and his mom is nice . happy almost hump day , have a blessed day try to stay cool , hydrated
Today's Joke - Tue, 18 Jul 2017
My boss is without peer when it comes to the rules and regulations that customs officials must follow. But when it comes to the law, well, that's a different story.
We were attending a court case in which we were prosecuting a smuggler. The judge asked the court, "Who is making these allegations?"
My boss stood up and proclaimed, "I am the alligator, your honor."
hummers are back !
thank you meme queen !
The Milkmaid and Her Pail
A milkmaid walked to the village with a pail of milk balanced on her head. She began to think about what she would do with the money she would make when the milk was sold, and decided she would buy some chickens. "They would lay eggs, which would bring in a good price at the market. Then I will use the money I earn to buy a new dress and hat," she said. "I will go to the market dressed so nicely, and all the young men will notice me. All the women will be jealous of me."
Eager to get on with her plans, she began to walk a little faster. "I will just look at those women, smile, and toss my head in the air." With that, she actually tossed her head. The pail fell to the ground and all of the milk spilled out.
The Moral of the Story: Do not count your chickens before they are hatched.
While it may be tempting to think being clean and sober means you can show others they were wrong about you, this is not the purpose of recovery. Recovery is a program that helps you stay clean and sober. Your work in the program is something you do for yourself.
I will not use my recovery as a means of retaliation or personal gain.
I guess it's my Mexican neighbor who has cost me hundreds of dollars poisoning my plants messing up my lawn mower and messing with my boat ( that's when I called the law ) . he's fat and doesn't work .................he'll be gone soon :) have a blessed day ♥
An alcoholic, a nymphomaniac, and a stoner all die and are going to Heaven.
When they get to the Pearly Gates, Peter completely loses him temper. He says, “I’m so sick of you sinners being allowed in just because you went to church every Sunday. So, here’s what we’re going to do; we’re going to see if you guys deserve to be in Heaven. I’m going to lock you each in your own room with your vice. If you can be in there for a year without touching it, I’ll let you in."
So, he sets the alcoholic up with a room that stretches as far as the eye can see, and it’s all shelves of the finest liquors ever made. He sets the nympho up with a room that is full of beautiful, flirty virgins, and there’s even a heart-shaped bed. Lastly, the stoner is set up with a room that has a never-ending supply of the best smelling weeds.
A year goes by and he checks on the alcoholic.The guy is passed out on the floor, ever drop drank. He is sent to hell. Peter checks on the nympho, every girl in the room is exhausted from sex. The guy is sent to hell. Checks on the stoner, and the guy is just sitting in the room, sober as can be, none of the weed has been touched.
Peter says, “Of all three of you guys, you were the one I least expected to be able to succeed. How did you do it?”
Giddy, the stoner asks, “Got a light?”
The worst things to hear at a tattoo parlor
"Eagle? I thought you said BEAGLE."
"We're all out of red, so I used pink."
"There are two Os in Bob, right?"
"I hate it when I get the hiccups."
"Anything else you want to say? You've got plenty of room back here."
"I'll bet you can't tell I've never done this before."
"The flag's all done and, you know, the folds of fat make a nice waving effect."
If you're never scared or embarrassed or hurt, it means you never take any chances.
Do we avoid making new friends because we're scared they won't like us? Do we get embarrassed when we make a mistake and avoid trying again? When we get our feelings hurt, do we think we're bad, or that something is wrong with us?
Being scared or shy or hurt are all part of being alive. When we try to stay away from painful feelings, we keep ourselves from having many wonderful adventures. If we're afraid to meet new people, we may never have any close friends. If we stop trying when we're embarrassed, we may never learn a better way of doing things. And if we don't share our hurt feelings, we may never find out that everyone else has the same feelings we have.
What can I try again today that I failed at yesterday?
have a blessed Sunday, Christ be with you ♥
day 3 Cheryl and we rock even on Sunday ♥
God insists that we ask, not because He needs to know our situation, but because we need the spiritual discipline of asking.
-- Catherine Marshall
An omniscient God must know what we desire before we ask. God knows that what we really need most is reliance on God. And how do we develop reliance? Like most other things, by practicing.
If it weren't for the need to remind us daily or hourly that all power flows from our Creator, we could just say a quick prayer at the beginning of each week, or each year, and be done with it. Surely God could fill our requests a year ahead of time. But getting our wishes granted isn't the purpose of prayer. Getting to know God is the purpose.
I need to be in touch with my Creator every hour of the day.
spouse you kiddin' , friend yes
have a blessed Saturday ♥
What’s the best part about gardening?
Getting down and dirty with your hoes.